The Exciting Place Between Two Extremes

Why it’s also okay to embrace being average

We love hearing about the success stories in the world. How people overcome their challenging situations, rise above them, and then transcend into an admirable, successful version of themselves. We find these people and their stories very inspiring. It gives us hope that we, one day, can achieve this success too. Especially if they came from an extremely dark place.

How hard can it be?

Let me tell you: pretty hard.

We’re living in an era which constantly reminds us of how successful other people appear to be and where flat bellies are normalised. This makes many of us question their own "succes" and how s

uccessful we could be. If only we had tried harder, woken up earlier, meditated longer, followed more morning routines involving ice baths and journaling (guilty of doing that last one!). This constant comparison game, whether conscious or not, chips away at our sense of enough-ness (Yes, that's a word I think).

If you’re doing your best in a world that keeps telling you to be more, do more, or fix yourself — let this be your reminder: “Don’t let the modern illusion of perceived perfection blur your view of the good you’re already doing."

I’ve written before about toxic positivity and the illusion that online success stories give us. They often provide a temporary boost of motivation. But over time, if you're not careful, they can leave you with an internal whisper: Why aren't I doing more?

We end up comparing the highlights of someone else’s day to the behind-the-scenes of our own life. Even thought we often say all the right things about success. “Success means something different to everyone,” or “What really is success?” - if we’re honest, the rise in depression and anxiety statistics suggests that many of us are struggling with the pressure to keep up – not just with others, but with the version of ourselves we think we should be.

So, here’s to being in the exciting state of… being average.

Yes, average! The place between extremes. Not operating in 'excel-at-everything' mode, but not giving up either. Just trying your best. Getting on with life, maybe sometimes smashing it, and other times simply managing to put matching socks on and show up. The real challenge? Staying kind, present, and focused whilst doing it.

If you are navigating life with both feet planted somewhere between perfection and apathy — you’re not lost. You’re in this exciting place between two extremes.

Now, let me clarify: I’m not against ambition and great achievements. We need people who dream big, invent wildly, lead bravely, and push the boundaries of what’s possible. The world needs those people and it’s awesome to get inspired by them.

But that doesn't mean you have to be like that to matter in life, to be appreciated or to be worthy.

You can also do meaningful, beautiful, extraordinary things right here in the middle zone. The place where you have enough energy to keep the wheels turning, not lose your cool, and help a neighbour out, but not necessarily write a best-selling book, organise a healthy meal e-very-day , or start a non-profit this week to live a worthwile life.

One of my clients once shared her belief that she had to be extraodinary — a high achiever in every area — because that was the only way she would finally be happy. Eventually. Maybe. But the constant chase of happiness can become its own trap. The more we cling to it, the more elusive it becomes.

Instead of trying to secure a permanent residency in the land of happiness (I tried with my Australian permanent residency, it's a lot of paper work I can tell you), what if we learned to live with a bit more ease, even when things feel a little messy?

Because here's the thing: Not every day will feel great. Some days, just getting through the basics is an achievement — answering your emails or texts, cook that healthy meal or just trying your best while you are battling with your own inner critic. And while we often strive to feel happy, peaceful, or fulfilled, maybe the goal isn’t to feel amazing all the time.

Maybe the goal is simply to stay connected to what gives life meaning — even when we’re tired, frustrated, or just a bit over it all.

That’s where a different kind of wisdom kicks in. Philosopher John Stuart Mill once said:

“Those only are happy who have their minds fixed on some object other than their own happiness.”

And isn’t that what most of us are really doing or want to be doing? Caring for our families, trying to be there for our friends, supporting our communities, doing things we believe in and are important to us — not because these things guarantee happiness, but because they matter. They give our lives a sense of direction, even on days when our compass feels slightly off.

So instead of measuring life by peaks of happiness or moments of success, what if we gave more credit to the in-between? Give yourself and others a bit more credit and compassion for holding things together, trying again when things do fall apart, showing kindness even when you are carrying your own heaviness.

See the worthiness in those who keep going, not for applause or recognition, but because it means something to them.

If you’re doing your best in a world that keeps telling you to be more, do more, or fix yourself — let this be your reminder:

“Don’t let the modern illusion of perceived perfection blur your view of the good you’re already doing.”

If you are navigating life with both feet planted somewhere between perfection and apathy — you’re not lost. You’re in this exciting place between two extremes.

And just to be clear: being average doesn’t mean being mediocre. It means you’re human. With highs and lows. Maybe with yesterday’s laundry still sitting on the chair or the bike that needs repairing still in the shed. Welcome to the club.